Game Fuel

Ape Threat Level: Yellow. It appears as if the attack by Timmy or Travis or whatever the heck that chimp's name was just happened to be an isolated attack. I'm keeping myself updated daily though...

As I am sure few of you know, I was a huge fan of Mountain Dew Game Fuel. It was a drink by Mountain Dew that was released in conjunction with the release of Halo 3. Game Fuel was amazing.

Unfortunately for me, it was discontinued after just a couple of months of production. Since then, I have been consistently in touch with the Pepsi Corporation in the hopes that the Game Fuel will be produced once again. Here is my most recent e-mail...

Dear Mountain Dew Makers,

My name is Casey Carmody, and I have a request for you. Nearly a year and a half ago, you created a product that was lovingly called “the nectar of the gods” by my friends and I. This product was none other than Mountain Dew: Game Fuel.

Game Fuel was one of the most amazing beverages I have ever tasted in my life. I loved it so much that I drank at least two cans a day. In fact, most days I drank more than that. I couldn’t help myself. Every time I drank a can of Game Fuel, I only desired more.

I was not alone in this feeling. My group of friends also loved Game Fuel deeply. I can think of many lazy Sunday afternoons that we spent sipping the sweet liquid of Game Fuel while watching ridiculous amounts of football. Nothing in life was better.

Alas, these glory days would not last. Game Fuel was discontinued. It became more and more difficult to find. We would hear rumors that cases of Game Fuel were spotted in a town 30 miles away. We would drive there in the hopes of obtaining a few last cans of our precious resource. Often times, our trips were in vain and we were left disappointed and broken.

Finally, the day came when I drank my last Game Fuel. I remember it well. It was the day of my college graduation. My friends, having a great amount of foresight, hid three cans of the soda so they could share it with me on a day that was one of my crowning achievements of life. Never had I received a better gift than the one I did on the day of my commencement. I was glad I could share this day with my friends by drinking a Game Fuel with them.

This brings me to my request. I beseech you to produce Mountain Dew: Game Fuel once again. I guarantee there are thousands, nay, millions of people in the world that would love nothing better than to taste the beverage that God himself smiles upon. Please fulfill my request. I promise you I would forever be indebted to you until the end of my life if you were able to grant this simple appeal. In your hearts, I believe you know it is right to create Game Fuel for all of its adoring fans.

Thank you.

Sincerely,
Casey Carmody

Well, this was the response I received from Dee Dee at the Pepsi Corporation....

I'm going to respond paragraph by paragraph:

Paragraph 1: That's awesome that you are glad to hear from me!

Paragraph 2: Of course I know you've stopped producing Game Fuel. That's why I wrote.

Paragraph 3: You sick, evil, demented jerks! WHY!?!?!? WHY!?!?!? WHY!?!?!?

Paragraph 4: I've spent a lot of time contacting you. If you were really my friend, you would make Game Fuel again.

Paragraph 5: I didn't know that there was that much recycled material in your containers. I would care more if there was actually Game Fuel in those containers.

It would appear as if my quest for Game Fuel's re-introduction did not work once again. Looks like its back to bidding on eBay for cases of Game Fuel that are well over a year old.....