Whiplash does not live up to the hype

Ape Threat Level: Yellow. The St. Paul Winter Carnival Royalty knighted Whiplash, the rodeo monkey. A knighted ape? This is serious.



Last Thursday, I witnessed the knighting of Whiplash the Rodeo Monkey (see above). Whiplash is famous for his Taco John's advertisements. Unfortunately, as friend George stated, this ceremony was one of the most over-hyped events of all time. This got me thinking about the other most over-hyped things I've experienced. Here's a top ten list....

10.The Matrix Reloaded and The Matrix Revolutions
I went and saw the Matrix Reloaded at midnight. It was not cool to watch. I didn't understand what the Architect was even talking about. At that point, I felt I was obligated to see the Matrix Revolutions to see how it ended. I wish I wouldn't have felt that obligation.

9. Fuddruckers
All I heard about for days was how awesome this burger place was. It was supposed to be amazing. I figured, "Hey! It's a burger buffet bar. Tons of burgers with loads of crazy condiments." No. There were about seven different condiments. Disappoinment like none other.

8. Nostradamus's Predictions
This junk is bunk, yet everybody keeps buying into it. I've read some of this stuff, and I have no clue what it's talking about. If I looked closely enough, I'm sure I could have found the winners to the last 10 Super Bowls. Good thing he's predicting the end of the world...

7. The Nike Vision Institute
Good ol' Troy Williamson (formerly of the Vikes) declared before the 2007 NFL season he had his eyes fixed at the Nike Institute. He would never drop a ball again. Well, Troy, you should get your money back after watching this.

6. Super Mario Bros. 2
I played that game for days. Threw vegetables at everything. None of it made any sense. In the end, you fight a huge frog and it was all a dream in Mario's head. Really!?!?!?!?

5. The Da Vinci Code
This is supposed to be the best novel, ever (so I've been told). Not even 100+ chapters can convince me that Jesus had a couple of kids.

4. The Avian Flu
I thought a huge epidemic was coming. I still haven't used the paper mask I purchased.

3. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
Roommate Pat joked that it was going to be a Star Wars movie in disguise. Turns out he was right.

2. World's Tallest Christmas Tree in North Mankato
A radio station touted that the world's tallest Christmas tree was going to be lit in North Mankato. It was actually a radio tower with lights on it. Lame.

1. Y2K
Let's get real. I was told the end of the world was coming. When the clock struck midnight, not even the lights flickered.